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Stupid Stinky Gerbil

I am a beautiful and wonderful cat, No other animal compares to me. Everyone in my house knows that. It’s so clear to see. Other animals wish they were me. I am the queen of this kingdom And I vanquish all my foes, The rodents that used to trespass my domain Are all dead and gone, as everyone knows. And now what I say goes. I get all the attention I get all the catnip and treats I get all the pets and scratches I get all the best spots on cozy seats. I get everything, my life’s complete. But one day, while I dream away Laying in a warm sun spot An enemy invades my kingdom. I wake up and see what the humans brought. I am disgusted by what they bought. The humans call it an “adorable gerbil.” But it’s obviously a rodent, can’t you see? Rodents are our sworn enemy. What is this insanity? What have you humans done to me? Now those silly children who used to serve me Try playing Wordle with the stupid gerbil. Those children would be better off Playing Wordle with a silly turtle Not a stupid...

The Clay Dragon


I put the clay dragon on the passenger seat. My car screeched as I sped out of the thrift store’s parking lot. 

I gotta relax. It’s not like I stole the knickknack. I paid for what it was worth. It definitely wasn’t worth twenty bucks, but it was worth five.

When I came to a stoplight, hot air singed my neck. Smoke burned my eyes and stung my lungs.

“I wasn’t worth twenty bucks to you, so you switched the tags?” a voice growled. Claws dug into my shoulders. “Well guess what? Your life’s not worth a penny to me.”


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