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Why Did You Eat the Chocolate?

Why did you eat the chocolate That had a label saying “Do Not Eat?!” It wasn’t filled with jam or caramel But magic mongoose meat! I know the chocolate’s sweet taste Sent you over the moon, But that chocolate is only safe For fairies and gnomes to consume. Do you have any idea What magic mongoose meat can do? Of course you don’t, silly head So I’ll go ahead and tell you. Within the next few minutes You’ll be feeling pretty happy But then you’ll be angry And suddenly you’ll feel sappy. Once the mood swings are over Your skin will turn blue Like that girl in Willy Wonka Only yours will be a darker hue! Then you’ll sprout wings And you’ll be able to fly But if you fly for over a minute You’ll fall from the air and die! If you live, you’ll start to smell Like the sweetest vanilla perfume Only to later smell like hot garbage Which will attract loads of raccoons! Once the stench dissipates You’ll sing so well, many will swoon But soon you’ll get a sore throat That makes you sound like a babo...

Keep it Private


Some things are meant to be shared

Maybe with a few strangers, friends, and family.

But other things are meant to remain private

And are not meant for the whole world to see.


Not everyone needs to know

Every little moment of your life

Whether it’s good or bad

Filled with joy or filled with strife.


Not everyone needs to know

Every thought that comes to your mind

Especially the ones without substance

And the ones that can get you in a bind.


It can be tempting to vent

For the whole world to hear 

But whatever is said in public

Cannot be taken back, I fear.


It can also be tempting

To share a very good moment

But doing it too much may devalue it

And perhaps reduce enjoyment.


Consider those close to you;

Sharing too much can reduce their pleasure.

They also deserve space to enjoy

The happy moments they treasure.


They also deserve space to process

Moments filled with unpleasantness.

The last thing they need is for everyone

To be all up in their business.


Some moments are precious

And must be protected

Like the precious stones

That a miner has collected.


Don’t be hasty to share everything 

With people in person or on the internet

Lest it come back to bite you

Leaving you with pain and regret.

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