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Stupid Stinky Gerbil

I am a beautiful and wonderful cat, No other animal compares to me. Everyone in my house knows that. It’s so clear to see. Other animals wish they were me. I am the queen of this kingdom And I vanquish all my foes, The rodents that used to trespass my domain Are all dead and gone, as everyone knows. And now what I say goes. I get all the attention I get all the catnip and treats I get all the pets and scratches I get all the best spots on cozy seats. I get everything, my life’s complete. But one day, while I dream away Laying in a warm sun spot An enemy invades my kingdom. I wake up and see what the humans brought. I am disgusted by what they bought. The humans call it an “adorable gerbil.” But it’s obviously a rodent, can’t you see? Rodents are our sworn enemy. What is this insanity? What have you humans done to me? Now those silly children who used to serve me Try playing Wordle with the stupid gerbil. Those children would be better off Playing Wordle with a silly turtle Not a stupid...

Betrayed

 Cold water splashed on Drake's face.

“Get up!” A voice barked.

Drake woke up with a start. He was in a prison with stone walls on each side and black, metal bars in front of him. His hands were cuffed and chained to the wall behind him. He looked up. Outside of his cell was a man holding a green pale, glowering at him. The man threw the green pale to the side.

“Niko?” Drake asked. He noticed the red badge Niko was wearing, with the symbol of a yellow badger. “What’s going on? Why are you wearing that badge?”

“Do you like it?” Niko asked pointing at it. “I wanted to get it in black, but they said they only offered it in red. Honestly I don’t know why they never thought to—”

“You joined them!? You joined the League of Malice!?”

“Isn’t it obvious?”

“Why Niko? Why did you join them?!”

“You mean you haven’t figured it out?”

“No.”

Niko shook his head. “Typical. I’m not surprised. You and the others could never comprehend the error of your ways.”

“What are you talking about?”

“You and the rest of the team always ate up all the ice cream.”

“…What?”

“You guys always ate all the chocolate ice cream! Every time I wanted to get desert after a long day’s work, it would be all gone. You never saved any for me! And what’s worse, Striker would always eat my lunch without my permission!

“Do you know how it feels to be saving the day from criminals, monsters, and aliens planning to take over the world, only to come home to headquarters to find that the desert is all gone and that your well-deserved meal has been eaten by your angsty teammate?!”

“Uh…I guess not.”

“The League of Malice offered me something you guys failed to provide me for years; unlimited chocolate ice cream, unlimited lunch with constant protection, and respect!”

“You—you turned on us, over food?”

“And lack of respect.”

“Look I’m sorry, okay. You’re right, we should have saved you some ice cream and Striker shouldn’t have eaten your lunch. But turning to the dark side isn’t the answer. Get me out of here and we’ll talk about it with the rest of the team. I’ll talk to Striker about not eating your lunch and we could share the ice cream. Come back to us.”

Niko rubbed his chin and thought about it for a moment.

“Can you guys afford to give me unlimited lunch and ice cream?” he asked.

“Well, no, but—”

“Then forget it!” Niko turned around to leave. “Enjoy your stay here, Drake. Your friends will be joining you shortly.”

“Niko, noooo!”

Niko walked up the stone stairs, and the door to the prison slammed shut.

Drake slumped to the floor and groaned. This was the third betrayal this week. Maybe it was time he and the rest of the Justice Fighters review their work ethics again.  


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