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Stupid Stinky Gerbil

I am a beautiful and wonderful cat, No other animal compares to me. Everyone in my house knows that. It’s so clear to see. Other animals wish they were me. I am the queen of this kingdom And I vanquish all my foes, The rodents that used to trespass my domain Are all dead and gone, as everyone knows. And now what I say goes. I get all the attention I get all the catnip and treats I get all the pets and scratches I get all the best spots on cozy seats. I get everything, my life’s complete. But one day, while I dream away Laying in a warm sun spot An enemy invades my kingdom. I wake up and see what the humans brought. I am disgusted by what they bought. The humans call it an “adorable gerbil.” But it’s obviously a rodent, can’t you see? Rodents are our sworn enemy. What is this insanity? What have you humans done to me? Now those silly children who used to serve me Try playing Wordle with the stupid gerbil. Those children would be better off Playing Wordle with a silly turtle Not a stupid...
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The Perfect Day

Beethoven basked in the sunlight, absorbing its energy, along with the other blades of grass on the lawn. 

“Today’s beautiful, isn’t it?” his friend Larry said.

“It sure is,” Beethoven replied. “It’s the perfect day. Nothing could make it any better.”

Suddenly, there was a strange sound. Vroom, Vroom!

“What was that?” Beethoven asked. “Thunder? Is it going to rain?”

“No. The sun’s still out and there are no clouds in the sky.” Then Larry began to tremble in fear. “Oh, no.”

“‘Oh no’ what?”

“It’s here.”

“What’s here?!”

The other blades of grass began to panic. 

“The end is nigh!” said one blade of grass.

Vroom, vroom!

“Run for your lives!” shouted another blade of grass.

“We can’t, we’re rooted to the ground!” said another.

VROOOOM!

The blades of grass screamed and shouted. 

Then, Beethoven saw something in the distance. It was big and red and noisy, and it was coming right for them!

“What is that!?” Beethoven exclaimed. 

“It’s The Shredder Beast!” Larry cried.

Beethoven and Larry watched in horror as The Shredder Beast devoured their friends, chopped them up into tiny pieces, and sent their remnants flying into the air. It was merciless. The Shredder Beast came closer and closer.

“Goodbye, Beethoven!” Larry cried over the noise of The Shredder Beast’s growls. “It was nice knowing you!”

The Shredder’s shadow loomed over them, the noise became deafening, and Beethoven saw the swirling teeth dicing up his friends as it came right at him. 

🚜🚜🚜

Jacob turned off the lawnmower and got off it. He looked at the green, freshly cut lawn with satisfaction. It was perfect. He took a deep breath and exhaled. What a perfect day. 


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