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Catch the Turkeys

Catch the turkeys, Before they get away! We need to cook them For Thanksgiving day! Get your nets, Grab your rifles If we hurry now We can catch them without trifles. Hide in the bushes Hide behind the trees If we get the jump on them We can catch them with ease. Stay very quiet Don’t make a sound. The turkeys are getting closer, They’re coming around. Get your nets ready And your rifles too. On the count of three, now. One, two– Bang! Great job! You got ‘em! Now get your sacks And let’s all bag them! It will be great to show off The fat turkeys we’re bringing. Let’s have a delicious dinner And a Happy Thanksgiving!

The Super Pie Delivery

Jacob ran out of the Pie Shop with a spring in his step as he held the box containing the blueberry pie in his arms. He walked up to his bike and put the pie in the basket. He strapped his helmet on, got on his bike, and pedaled down the sidewalk. He was making a pie delivery today, which wasn’t anything new. However, this pie delivery in particular was special.

Today, he wasn’t just delivering a pie to neighbors, the crazy cat lady, or the man who claimed to own a castle in New York. This time, he was delivering a pie to none other than Captain Hero, the superhero of Glenwood. Captain Hero had saved banks from bank robbers, saved people from flaming buildings, and saved the town from villains with evil gadgets. It would be an honor to meet him and, hopefully, get his autograph.

He had to deliver Captain Hero’s pie to his secret headquarters, which was, honestly, not very secret at all. Everyone in town knew where it was thanks to the big sign in Captain Hero’s yard.

Getting to Captain Hero’s place should be easy, Jacob thought. I just hope nothing crazy happens like last time.

But on the balcony of a nearby building, a man and woman in red and black watched Jacob from above. The man was using his binoculars to get a closer look at the box containing the pie.

“You see that, Laurel?” the man asked handing her the binoculars.

“You mean the pie delivery kid, Leroy?” Laurel asked.

“Yes! He’s delivering that pie to Captain Hero.”

“And we should care about that because…?”

“Because stealing Captain Hero’s pie is the best way to rain on his parade. I’m so sick of him stopping our evil schemes and crushing our hopes and dreams. It’s only fair that we crush his hopes and dreams too!”

“By stealing his pie?”

“YES! First, we shall steal his pie, then we will FaceTime him, and then we will make him watch as we devour his delicious treat! It shall be the ultimate torment! And the Dangerous Duo shall finally reign supreme! MWA HA HA HA!”

Laurel shook her head. “As much as I hate seeing other people eat when I’m on an empty stomach, I have a bad feeling about this.”

As Jacob pedaled on, something in the corner of his eye flew towards him. He looked up to the sky to see Leroy and Laurel on gliders.

“What the heck!? The Dangerous Duo!?”

The Dangerous Duo landed in front of him.

“In the flesh!” Leroy said.

 At first, Jacob thought about stopping. Instead, he pedaled faster.

“Um, Leroy,” Laurel stepped out of the way. “Might want to move.”

But Leroy didn’t move. “Stop right there, kid! Hand over that pie!”

Jacob rammed him to the ground and ran him over. “No! Order your own!” He couldn’t let a couple of criminals steal Captain Hero’s important dessert.

Leroy, now lying on his back on the concrete, blinked his eyes as he tried to process what had happened. When he came to his senses, he stood up. “Hey! Stop! Come back! After him!”

Jacob pedaled as fast as he could towards Captain Hero’s house as the Dangerous Duo trailed after him.

Laurel panted. “Leroy, use your Maple Syrup Gun.”

“My what?”

“Your—ugh! Your sticky doohickey!”

“Oh, yeah! Forgot I had that.”

Leroy pulled out the Maple Syrup Blaster and pulled the trigger, sending maple syrup onto Jacob’s back tire.

Jacob skidded on the sidewalk; his bike wobbled. It wouldn’t be long before the back tire stopped spinning. It was time to abandon ship! Jacob stopped his bike, grabbed the pie, and ran like the wind. Luckily, he was one of the best sprinters in his track team, and by the time the crooks had made it to his sticky bike, he was halfway to Captain Hero’s house. If I maintain this speed, I’ll make it to Captain Hero’s place in a couple of minutes.

Leroy pointed his Maple Syrup Blaster at Jacob and pulled the trigger, but it jammed. “Come on, come on,” he muttered as he pulled the trigger again and again. The maple syrup gun whirred and smoked, and then…Kaboom! Maple syrup gushed out through the back and got all on his clothes and face. “Curses! Stupid contraption!” He tossed the broken gadget aside.

Despite their efforts, the Dangerous Duo couldn’t keep up with Jacob. They slowed to a stop and gasped for breath.

“Okay, so he’s…a pretty fast…runner…ah…” Leroy said. “But…We’ve got…this.”

“Ugh, no we don’t!” Laurel said. “This is ridiculous! Why do all this over pie?”

“This isn’t just about the pie, it’s about the revenge!” Leroy said. “Now watch in awe as I use my latest weapon!”

“Whatever, I quit. I can’t run anymore. Go on without me.” She turned around. “I’ll just stop by the bakery and steal my own pie.”

“Wait! At least stay and watch me use this thing.” Leroy pulled out a small remote control with multiple buttons on it, each with an image of a feather of different sizes.

Laurel turned around and looked at the remote. “Oh no. Not the Chicken Feather Device.”

“Nope! This is the Chicken Feather Device 2.0! It’s totally different.” He pressed a button and the remote started to whirr.

“No, don’t!”

There was a flash of light, and suddenly, there were tons and tons of chicken feathers surrounding Jacob. The pile of chicken feathers were so high, that it went above his head. Feathers were in his mouth, ticking his ears and nose, and poking his eyes. It was terrible! Leroy must’ve used his Chicken Feather Device again. I’ve got to get Captain Hero!

With the pie in one arm, he tried his best to swim up to the surface. It was hard work and it was taking forever! Is this it? Is this how I’m going to die? Drowning in chicken feathers with only a few pie deliveries to my name?

But just when he thought all hope was lost, he broke through the surface and spat out the chicken feathers. He was still alive! He looked behind him to see the Dangerous Duo waving their hands above the sea of chicken feathers. I guess they didn’t think things through.

Jacob fixed his eyes on Captain Hero’s hideout as it stood on the hilltop above the feathers like a lighthouse. He swam threw the pile of chicken feathers with all his might. When he reached the base of the hill, he clambered himself onto solid ground. He was so happy, he felt like he could fly.

At last, land!

But he knew his job was not yet done. He ran up the hill to the house with the big red sign that read, “Captain Hero’s Secret Hideout” and banged on the door. “HELP! The Dangerous Duo is after me and your blueberry pie!”

The door swung open. Captain Hero walked out in his super cool golden cape and his orange superhero suit. “Did someone say Dangerous Duo?! Where?”

“Somewhere in that sea of feathers. They tried to steal your pie and they got syrup on my bike!”

Captain Hero looked at the chicken feathers and laughed. He flew over to the Dangerous duo, picked them both up by their shirt collars, and flew back over to Jacob. “So, Leroy, I see you actually used the Chicken Feather Device again. I thought you had learned your lesson.”

“NOOO! Foiled again!” Leroy shouted. His face was covered in feathers thanks to his Maple Syrup Device.

“Do you have to state the obvious every single time?” Laurel asked.

“Now don’t you think you owe this boy an apology?” Captain Hero said.

“No!” Leroy said. “I’m a villain, and we villains never owe anyone anything! Next time, Captain Hero, I shall have my revenge, on both you and that silly pie delivery boy, uh…what’s your name, kid?”

“None of your business.”

“Oh, okay. I shall have my revenge, on both you and that silly pie delivery boy, None of Your Business! You will see!”

“Oh, shut it!” Laurel said. “Even if we did get that stupid pie, it’s not like your stupid plan would’ve worked anyway. I hate blueberry pie, and we can’t FaceTime with our lousy flip phones.”

“I was planning on robbing a bank later so we could buy smartphones!”

“Right, and that would have worked so well, wouldn’t it?”

“Yes!”

The two continued to bicker about failed evil plans and plans that were bound to work next time.

Captain Hero shook his head and turned to Jacob. “Sorry about the trouble they caused. How about this; after I lug these crooks to jail and clean up all these chicken feathers, I help you fix up your bike.”

Jacob’s eyes widened. “You’d do that?”

“Of course! It’s the least I can do after you protected my pie from these guys.”

“Could you, by any chance, give me your autograph too?”

“I don’t see why not. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve gotta take out the trash. The sooner I do that, the sooner we can get to work.” With that, Captain Hero took off at lightning speeds to the city to put the crooks in their new prison cells.

Jacob watched in awe as a streak of light followed him as he flew through the air. It was times like these that made delivering pies worthwhile.

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